I LOVE NEW YORK. It is literally a concrete jungle, where dreams are made of. If you haven’t been you should go immediately, if your means and work schedule and life schedule allows you.
That was a HUGE disclaimer, but as I get older, life is not quite as simple as “OMG, we should so go to Vegas/SF/NYC/Europe in the summer” — It’s more like, hmm, can I do XYZ this summer, well, there is so-and-so’s wedding, you have that work golf tournament, it’s important for us to be there for so and so’s birthday, we do have that destination wedding next year…. I should be there for the VP’s presentation… then suddenly, the dream dies.
LUCKILY, my sweet Husband had to go to the Big Apple for work. He went last year too, this year all of the wives were invited. Last year they were not. I am glad to know that I wasn’t the only one who death stared my true love:
“YOU WILL INVITE ME NEXT YEAR”
It was so much fun! We saw Misery wherein Bruce Willis, played Bruce Willis, writer held hostage. Beggars can’t be choosers, it’s still Broadway. We were also approximately 60 minutes late, and were heckled in true NYC fashion, which made me feel oddly special.
Next year, I want to see Hamilton, it looks sick. Or maybe I’ll piggy back onto my sister’s “Spring Break” trip where she gets to stay at the Waldorf in true style:
Ok, now lets talk about something super valley girl, but since you already know that I’ll say just about anything in here, I think some of you might be able to like, empathize with me.
Remember when, you were in maybe middle school or high school and one of these situations occurred:
- You got the “in toy/clothing brand/bike/technological thing” for birthday/christmas/justbecause
- The most popular girl/coolest guy in school invited you over to their house to play / hang out / asked you out / asked you to come to a party with them
In any event, remember when you had something that you could bring to school that would act like social currency? I’m not even sure that the intent was to make anyone jealous, but like, whatever it would elevate your status.
Humans are so weird.
The difference between then and now, is that NOW if you have something that you want to share, not necessarily to make people jealous or to use as a social tool, but if you did, or it could be implied that you were trying to position yourself or brag, or the “thing” could perhaps make you look better than your friends, family, peers, you MUST downplay it as much as possible, to not, is adult social suicide.
What is my point?
I wanted to be like “OMG! I totally feel like a Stepford wife! Yay! I get to go on a “business trip” and meet my husband, like in the movies, or like how super rich people always fly their wives out, and roll their eyes with their colleagues: “guess we better let the women come, or there will be an uprising” (they all chuckle knowingly)…”
A note about grammar, clearly I don’t give a fuck – so don’t judge me, my goal is to let you read this and pretend we are chatting in a cafe or bar. Where there is no verbal punctuation.
Anyway – back to the Stepford wifing comment – If I said that, it would be like I threw a grenade into the conversation. My good friends, they wouldn’t really give a fuck because they know me really well and would know that I’m not posturing, I’m just Mere.
The acquaintance population however may have the following reactions:
- “Nice to see some people don’t seem to care about the recession”
- “I’m glad that we got the vote for nothing”
- “Does she even know how she sounds right now? So sad”
- “Why is she gloating? I don’t go around telling everyone about the awesome trips that I go on, have some class”
- “New Money”
We are actually poor, I just know that they say “New Money” all the time in TV shows about New York.
Do you know what I mean though?? Like, adulthood sucks, it’s like excitement is frowned upon. Unless of course you are getting married or having a baby, then your excitement level is carefully scrutinized:
- “When I was engaged, I was literally bursting with excitement to marry the man of my dreams and create a life together, I could barely concentrate”
- “You must be so excited, I was”
- “You must be so excited to plan the wedding, it was soooo much work, but so worth it!, Yay, Mrs ______”
- “You’re expecting??? You must be SO EXCITED!! Parenthood is the biggest blessing”
In this situation, you are NOT allowed to say: If by excitement, you mean anxiety about a life changing experience and parting with a large lump sum of disposable income, then yes, of course I’m excited!
I mean, of course we are all excited about these things, but like the pressure is on to be THE MOST EXCITED WOMAN IN THE WORLD.
Weddings and Babies, are socially acceptable reasons for a woman to be excited.
Trips, Clothes, anything that can make your peers jealous – do NOT be excited. EVER.
I don’t think I have a point. I am just evaluating (and ok, pouting) that I felt like it was unfair that I couldn’t be honest, that I was freaking out about my wedding, and was so relieved when it was over and I could go back to being my Husband’s girlfriend / partner – but that I couldn’t like sing from the sidewalk that I got to go on a business trip to NYC as like a Stepford Wife and I was really excited about it (because of the nature of the trip – I was excited to go to NYC, but MORE excited because I got to go with my Businessman Husband (I’m so proud of him!!) –
God, I’m rambling, but do you know what I mean?
I was going to write about the Holidays, but lets wait until after Christmas and NYE shall we? Probably more juicy wonderfulness after that time anyway.
Let me know if y’all feel my pain at all…